Sunday, November 23, 2014

Miracle

Ok, about miracle. Read something then suddenly it just kicks me off.

I dont believe in miracle. Call me whatever you like, unbeliever, realist, rationalist. Ok, before you assume, I do believe in higher power, in my case, God. I do believe in him. I'm a muslim.

Well, i believe in real effort, pray, and luck. I do believe that God decides our fate, and God plays a big role in our life, that our prays to him will somehow help to determine our way, enhances our success, but It's not necessarily God creates miracle. Ok, what I meant by miracle is not about superstitious thing which there are propehts and their miracles. What I meant by miracle is every day miracle. Like, someone is suddenly awake from coma because of miracle. It's not. They are awake because its not their time yet to die. Or because the medication finally works or anything. Not because of some kind of miracle. Everything can be explained.

Please dont say miracle. Because if you believe in miracle, then you just got lazy because you will always think, "God will give me miracle. I just have to keep praying." And then you will not do the actual effort, the real actions that actually change the situations or improve things. If you say miracle, your mindset is stuck. Like if someone, for example, comes back from vegetative state after 2 years, you would only think that it's because of God's miracle. You dont want to try to figure out in why he actually  is alive again because you think it's God's will. You will always be wrapped in somekind of walls to understand more about this world. Ok, in easy word, you will be stupid

And miracle is different from luck. Luck is a coincidence. Luck is man made that is in your favour. Ok, example, you pass a difficult exam. It's not a miracle. It's because you study hard enough, or because you answer correctly, or because the examiner doesnt check your answers correctly or anything. There is always something that makes the event (cause and effect law). And, if the event doesnt favour us, we call it bad luck or unfortunate event. But miracle is different. It's in God's hand, it doesnt fulfill cause and effect law because it's God's will. 

It doesnt mean that I dont believe in power of God, or the power of pray. I do. God wants us to pray because he wants to know what we really want, what we really hope for, how much we want to get what we wants, how hard our effort is amd what we will do to get it. He wants to know if we are brave enough to actually get what we want. Ok, for example, you want a handphone (or anything works). You work for it. You get a job and get money. But if you dont say it to other people. What you want is just in your head. But because you say it, what you want becomes real. That you really want a handphone amd you are working to get it. The same goes with God. He knows that you want many things, but through pray, he wants to see which one you really wish to happen. 

In the end, please dont say miracle. It really gives me goosebump. 

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Skripsi part 2


Jadi ceritanya adalah malam ini aku revisi skripsi (lagi). Skripsi itu bikin stres, beneran deh. Nafsu makan hilang (padahal kemarin aku makan berkali-kali (ampe lupa berapa kali), minum susu dua kali. Hari ini mengingat deadline skripsi besok, semua semangat makan hilang (ga tau mesti seneng apa sedih. Seneng sih, bisa kurus haha, sedih karena aku ga makan). Karena stress akhirnya aku memutuskan untuk dolan-dolan dulu malem-malem. Atas desakan orang-orang yang entah peduli, entah kasihan sama aku, aku akhirnya memutuskan untuk membeli makan. Karena tempat makan uda pada tutup akhirnya aku membeli makanan yang aku beli sekali setahun, McD (lebay, tapi iya ding. Ga ingat kapan terakhir makan ini). Mari kita doakan semoga perutku bisa kuat menampung makanan ini, tanpa diare atau mules esok harinya (biasa, perut orang kampung, ga ding orang yang biasa makan sehat haha, ga kuat makan ginian). Flu dan batukku juga nih. Berdoa dimulai.

Amin

Oke, semangat Zelin! Ga boleh ngeluh. Sebentar lagi kamu bisa bilang, “Skripsi? Apa itu skripsi? Bahasa dari planet lainkah? Apakah itu sejenis makanan? Minuman? Makhluk hidup atau mati?” Haha. Pernah dibeginiin sama dokter tutor (nama dokter disamarkan). Sakitnya tu di sini (nunjuk otak).




Ok, karena aku capek memikirkan skripsi, jadi aku memutuskan untuk memikirkan planningku, mulai dari yang short term hingga long term ya, sebelum aku berumur 30 tahun.

Very short term (jangka waktu 1 hari hingga 1 minggu ke depan).

1. Selesaikan deadline revisi skripsi (besok!)Oiya, aku uda pendadaran. Alhamdulillah, haha. Kapan-kapan kalo ada waktu dan ga males aku cerita hal-hal lucu dari pendadaranku. 

2. Periksa laporan praktikum (untung cuma 3 kali ngajar. Maaf ya yang dapet giliran ampe sepuluh kali ngajar di blok ini). 

3. Ngerjain HSC. Ini nih, udah tau aku males nyatet, dengerin kuliah suka ketiduran, disuruh nulis HSC. Semoga slide dosennya jelas, amin. 

4. Update blog. Tentang pendadaran, ke Makassar, dan hutangku ke orang-orang yang udah aku mintain pendapatnya tentang “strong personality”. 

5. Ngerjain kuesioner blok 4.2. Ternyata kita belum bisa move on dari blok ini ya. 

6. Nonton “Interstellar”. Untuk semua yang uda nonton, tolong jangan cerita-cerita ya. Radar “spoiler alert” ku berbunyi terus menerus nih. 

7. Rajutan. Omaigat, aku ampe lupa ama pesanan rajutan. 

8. Nyicil belajar termin ini. 

9. Utang tidur dibayar, wkwkwk. 

Short term (jangka waktu 1 minggu hingga 1 bulan ke depan). 

1. Lulus blok ini dengan nilai yang memuaskan (amiiiiin). 

2. Les bahasa prancis, dan bahasa jawa (kalo ada. Kemampuan bahasaku agak susah diasah soalnya). 

3. Nonton serial TV Bones dan Hannibal. Katanya bagus. 

4. Dsb dsb 

Medium term (jangka waktu 1 bulan hingga 1 tahun ke depan). 

1. Persiapan OSCE compre dengan matang. Jangan seperti OSCE KBK III kemarin ya Zelin. Selamanya kamu ga bisa bergantung pada keberuntungan. 

2. Lulus OSCE compre dengan nilai memuaskan 

3. Dapet coass gelombang satu atau dua. Kalo dapet gelombang dua, aku mau dolan-dolan dulu, haha. 

4. Koass deh 

Long term (jangka waktu dari 1 tahun hingga seterusnya). 

1. Jadi dokter (jelas). 

2. Lulus internship 

3. Magang di WHO, atau PBB, atau Intepol, atau BIN, atau kemenkes. 

4. Jadi dokter yang bekerja di kapal atau masuk TNI AL. 

5. Punya tengkorak asli. Sebenarnya, aku uda lama pingin banget punya tengkorak asli, tapi aku ga mau beli, karena menurutku itu merupakan salah satu bentuk perdagangan manusia. Ga mau juga ambil di lab anat, udah jelek tengkoraknya. Mungkin kalo suatu hari nanti, aku bisa ikut ekspedisi gitu, aku bisa nyimpen tengkorak, haha.

6. Dolan-dolan sebelum nikah. Kaya dokter (nama disamarkan, ayo siapaaa?) 

7. Terakhir, nikah sebelum berusia 30 tahun. Karena aku masih 19, dan goalku menikah sebelum berusia 30 tahun, jadi aku ga terlalu mempermasalahkannya.

Semoga aku bisa melakukan semua doa dan harapanku, amin. Semoga kalian yang membaca ini, akhirnya memiliki motivasi dan juga bisa terkabul semua doa dan harapannya, amiiin. 

Kenapa aku bagi waktunya seperti yang diatas? Karena aku membaginya dari berdasarkan yang paling visible dan paling bisa dikerjakan. Aku belum memasukkan rencana jadi dokter spesialis karena aku masih bingung aku mau jadi spesialis apa. Semoga Allah memberi yang terbaik. 

Terakhir, dapet salam dari temenku.


Saturday, October 25, 2014

Silence of The Nights


Remember those days?
When we would wait all day
For the night came?

Remember those nights?
When we would talk all night long
Not knowing how to stop?

Remember those mornings?
When we would race to wake
To say morning first?

Remember those times?
When we were happy
Eventhough we were far apart?

I do, my dear, I do
But It was a long time ago!
Ages!

My dear, raise your head
Look at me in the eyes
Let me see whats in them

Tell me my dear, 
Do you still love me
In all the silences?

My dear, are you waiting for me?
Waiting for us to go back to where we left?
Waiting for us to start anew what we ended?

My dear, havent you got tired of waiting?
Havent you got bored? 
Havent you?

My dear, let me kiss you my dear
Let me hug you for one last time
Let me, my dear, let me

My dear, tell me
What should I do to make you go?
What should I do to make you forget?

My dear, go away
Be free, run away
Flutter your wings, fly away

My dearest friend, be free
Let the new love come to you
Tell me you will, my dear, yes you will

Let me kiss you one more time.
Good bye, my friend.
Good bye

Inspiration from Lady Chatterly's Lover and Madame Bovary

My friend, you are not Molly, and I'm not Irene, not anymore.